Why I'm Done Being Flexible
I’m OOO but I’m not really OOO, you know?
“What’s your availability?”
“I’m flexible :)”
No, I’m not. I’ve decided that I am no longer flexible in how I budget my time.
Over the past month I’ve been learning how to deal: with myself, with pouring my heart and soul into producing content I’m proud of, with my time and energy. It’s been a real journey!
There are infinite articles on the power of saying “yes” but at the same time, the glorification of turning things down seems to be marketed to the same overachiever-type. I’m getting conflicted messages. What’s a girl to do?!
“When it rains, it pours” is a common phenomena in the freelance world, and I truly and madly understand now why that is. Earlier this month I had zero job prospects. ZERO. I was lying on the couch in a jobless and literal depression trying to secure some work, any work.
One thing they don’t tell you when you transition from full-time jobbing to working for yourself is that your emails are no longer urgent to anyone save you. Gone are the days of the 2-minute turnaround; it’s time to sit back and wait.
So, yeah, when the seeds I threw hopelessly into the wind earlier on this month started to sprout all at once (and really quickly, I might add) I suddenly found myself in quite a predicament: what do I say yes to? Who do I really want to work with? How do I do this?
A non-negotiable I stand by is reading on the beach.
Generally speaking, I’m a pretty flexible person. I have no dietary restrictions and I change up my skincare routine regularly; I drink both red and white wine. But when it comes to the big decisions (will this job impact the course of my career and personal life for the foreseeable future? Will I still get to dictate my own vacation time?) I freeze. I overthink everything and make panic decisions, taking on too much work only to burn out not long after.
So when those offers came pouring in, I took a long, hard look at my life, planned vacations and mental health status and decided once and for all that things were going to be different this time around.
I made a list of my non-negotiables. I knew that I wanted the ability to work from home for the majority of the week, and I knew that I wanted to go on fun, restorative trips with Andy and our friends. I knew that I wanted the freedom to visit my family and still be able to get paid for what I do. But mostly, I knew that I wanted to work on projects that challenged me and that I would feel proud of.
When it came time to discussing my availability during negotiations, I knew that I couldn’t compromise when it came to time. And guess what? It worked out (!!!). I’m hitting the balance that I never thought I would be able to achieve. I’m working on projects that I’m genuinely excited about, with creatives and individuals who inspire me. I’ve hit the ground running and am ahead of my goals for 2019. How crazy is that?!
Part of that might have to do with the fact that I’m choosing to work with female entrepreneurs with values that align with mine, but I’d like to attribute at least some of that success to my own personal gumption.
Like I said, I’m done being flexible.